In the back of the book: The Giving Tree

Saturday afternoon reading <3 "The Giving Tree" by Shel Silverstein

He read to me. Some situationship that I had back in my undergraduate days. He read, "The Giving Tree" by Shel Silverstein. In retrospect, I believe he was telling me that I did not have to give him anything. He just wanted to spend time with me. Alternatively, at the time, I did not understand the meaning. I think that's the importance of revisiting books at different times of your life though. We take away different meanings (i.e. the answer is in the back of the book).

I can't honestly say how many times I read this book. In 2025, I have taken away a new meaning. The tree offered every ounce of its being, and the boy took from the tree without hesitation. Her leaves. Her apples. Her branches. Until there was nothing left but her stump. And even with a little stump, she still offered the boy a place to rest. I find it fascinating that all the tree wanted was to spend time with the boy, and he wanted for.. things he deemed more important... I think? I don't know.

Subscribe, pls.

Oddly enough, looking back on that day that he read this story to me, I feel compelled to admit that story time was foreshadowing. I have a terrible habit of giving and giving and giving. Unfortunately, I gave so much recently... until I did not have anything left. I had no metaphoric leaves, apples, or branches to give. And... well... I was so depleted of everything and I landed myself in the hospital. Stretching myself so thin. People-pleasing. Giving more than I had to offer landed me in the hospital.

My dad says, a hard head makes a soft behind. Well, I am a soft behind with a shit ton of medical expenses. Expenses aside, I have learned how to save some time and energy for me. I have learned to do so in a way that prioritizes my needs without asking for permission. I still don't have all the answers to really important questions, but that is the beauty of life, right? Find a stump (or, in my case a mental health hospital), take a seat, and figure out what you want/need. The rest will come. Pinky promise.

Songs for today - Me'Shell NdegéOcello - Fool of Me - Olivia Dean - Baby Steps